If I could list the things I value most in the world, somewhere in my top ten would be the liberty of time, and the option of choice (both of which, by the way also relate to financial freedom and the desire to help all the business owners we work with at Identify move closer to this in terms of allowing them to work reasonable hours, and earn enough to be comfortable, while still treating their staff and clients well. )
I’ve chosen to settle my business close to my home, and have zero desire to relocate out of the beach suburb of Orewa to be in a more “marketing agency prestigious” suburb such as Ponsonby, Parnell or Newmarket, as I can not see more benefit for me and my staff in terms of the travel time we’d waste every day.
Time is one of my most precious commodities. Perhaps it was years as a single parent of three, trying to eke out a few quiet moments in the toilet alone. Or maybe it was before that, and related to the fact I almost died of Wolf Parkinson Whyte during my first pregnancy, and from that survived with a determination to make as much of my life, as I could, count. Or perhaps (and possibly far more likely, it is both these things, along with a growing recognition that I’m in my mid-life and I’m not prepared to waste time on unnecessary actions, meetings, or fluffery
With fluffery in mind, let me present to you my hair..
I was originally determined to NOT be my mother – a woman who has always pursued life and experiences and opportunities with focused desire (all of that is good!), but did so while abandoning the habit of proper “do’s” and a made-up face.
To that end I started wearing make up from a young age, but really, the habit of wearing make-up and doing my hair every day properly has never really stuck. I just find there are so many other things I’d rather do.
And so here I am – like my mother, I’m often completely make up free, and though my hair is brushed, it is rarely perfectly in place.
I sometimes feel the expectation (is it actually there?) of applying a face, and making myself immaculate. Perhaps I feel it more so because I am round – and fat people can feel they have the added expectations of taking extra care least we continue to build the image that we are in fact lazy drop kicks who don’t care about our appearance, and are using the extra time to eat more pies. It’s not that I don’t about how I look – it’s that I like my face to feel like it is mine – not covered with something else to turn it into a well painted version of myself. And my hair – well it’s a time thing and a priority. Plus - I don't eat pies. Thus ruining this theory completely.
Like my call to start wearing ALLBIRDS sneakers instead of heels because they are:
a. More comfortable
b. Mean I move more through the day
c. And because my 16 year old says heels are a patriarchal constraint and as her mother I should be modelling liberation from such things...
Here is what I’d rather do (and do do) in the mornings I “should’ be putting on makeup:
1. Sleep. I get up at 5:30 (or earlier of the puppy is having a bad night) and I’m happy to NOT get up earlier. I like sleep. It’s awesome
2. Showers – more important than hair and makeup I reckon
3. Dog walks with my husband – we go get a coffee and then walk the beach with two of our dogs. We connect, we share our upcoming day, move our bodies and get caffeine
4. Connect with my girls – all are tween/teens and it’s a good time to check in with them
5. Take two of them to school early for early study/music/debating classes – saves them time, and a walk in the dark
6. Start work early so I can be home for my girls, make a home cooked meal, and fit in a second walk of the day
7. Spend the day focussed on clients, and my team and connect with them.
None of that would I want to replace with the 10-15 minutes I need to apply my makeup and do my hair. Do I sit on judgement of people who do find the time? Absolutely NOT – But I do think, do we judge women on a make up free face? Does it mean we feel they are somehow less professional? Or capable?